CattleMax

It takes all kinds of animals to make a suicidal movement work.

Not every pig is up to the heavy lifting of barbecue manufacture or kitchen staffing. Not every chicken has what it takes to front a poultry-killing enterprise. And lord knows not every goat has it in him to butt aside all obstacles standing between him and the grill.

So it is with our CattleMax calf.

After all, this world needs slaughterables with brains and not just tender, succulent meat. When cattle ranchers need to track such delicious arcana as scrotal circumference, %KPH (kidney-pelvic-heart fat), and semen inventory, they turn to CattleMax and its tech-support calf.

When he's not pounding out code that allows cows to be managed and processed with speed and efficiency—the foremost hope of all cattle!—he serves as the firm's figurehead. And he's grateful for the opportunity. Whether it's the thrilling world of carcass details or the intricacies of Beef Improvement Federation standards, he's only too happy to bring cattle management (and cattle managers) into the 21st century!