Cranky Joe's

Any normal, life-loving pig in this position would be cranky. Born to die, fated to be dominated. Who wouldn't be cranky? Or, well, demoralized, maybe, or infuriated, depending on the animal's position on the introverted/extroverted continuum. In any event, crankiness hardly seems out of line.

But remember where you are. You are not in a rational land, a land founded on sound propositions and their logical conclusions. No.

You have stumbled into a world of corruption, a world where even axioms are held up to doubt and ridicule. Where the very concept of truth has been hounded to the borderlands.

Cranky Joe is cranky not because of injustice. Rather, it is because no one is properly saucing him. Untended, he is required to sauce himself. He must see to the details of his death and grilling, and that is what's got him in a bad mood: They're not cooking him right.







Addendum: Are you, like us, reminded of the Bad Boyz Barbecue pig, peeved because his would-be executioner's aim was poor?

Addendum 2: The other day's installment of purported comic strip Crock is likewise relevant. The chicken is upset due to laundry-related matters, not the prospect of being boiled to death.