Thursday, September 25, 2008

17th Annual State of Nebraska Barbeque Championship

Many have wondered. They have looked upon the psychological wreckage at the heart of the suicidefoodist movement and asked, "Why?"

Yes, we know that "food" animals are suicidal. We know that death is their highest ambition, their noblest aspiration. But why?

The 17th Annual State of Nebraska Barbeque Championship gives us some insight.

It's all about prestige. For some suicidal "food" animals, suffering and death are merely necessary. For these discerning few, the act of dying needlessly isn't enough. They want to go out on a flaming Viking pyre of fame.

And what better way to achieve fame than being grilled to perfection by Nebraska's finest animal cookers? While their skin sizzles and puckers, the rockabilly pig, the prankish chicken, and the dumb-but-well-meaning cow bask in the red-hot reflected glory of this Greater Omaha Barbeque Society–sanctioned event.

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