Monday, August 4, 2008

Ox 'n' Bull Barbeque

Hunky, proletarian beefcake in tight jeans: check. Adoring cow/nymph: check. Ribs on a fork: check. This one's got something for everyone!

Or, well, not quite everyone. One key demographic has been left unaddressed by Ox 'n' Bull's messaging. We're struggling to see where this takes humans into account.

Of course—of course!—it caters to the deep-seated psychological drives common to all bovines. Specifically, the desire to destroy your fellow bovines in a warm-up to killing and grilling your loved ones and then yourself. And, naturally, the urge to pair with a large carnivorous steer so that your babies will have ample... meat. To eat.

Okay, we have to say it. This thing is a big, bloody mess.

The couple are obviously surrogates for the human consumers, but the imagery is all over the place. She's ecstatic at his manly flesh-cooking abilities. He's smug in the knowledge that serving up her dead grandfather is the surest way into her apron.

What was no doubt intended as a cute depiction of barbecue enthusiasts (perhaps even Ox 'n' Bull's proprietors, a motif we've seen before) becomes a tasteless pscyhogenic minefield.


Jana said...

But... I don't get it. One of them should be an ox, and the other should be a bull. A bull is an adult male cow. An ox is a castrated male cow over 2 years of age with horns that can respond to voice commands. Is the 'female' cow transgendered?

Ben said...


Maybe they were thinking "Cow 'n' Bull"?


Anonymous said...

I vote for transgendered! The sad Ox is sexually confused by what happened to it. Being castrated will do that to you. So he puts on dresses and throws himself at bulls in the hopes of being accepted. But alas, he was only accepted by a cannibalistic bull who wanted him for his ribs.

Anonymous said...

You people are morons... There is nothing here thats says anything about eating Beef. Those are PORK ribs, ya know, the other white meat.
And for all of you Veggie eating Vegans...Those veggies were ALIVE, before you KILLED them and ATE them. Hypocrites!! The only think you could eat and not kill, is a material....