A certain recent advertisement has the power to send impotent rationality back to its hated realm.
Shocking disclosure: The ad is for a Burger King product.
Who would have thought Burger King, of all animal-adoring institutions, would inspire a degenerate advertisement?
The commercial in question is a shrine dedicated to debasement. Hogs scampering smilingly onto the killing floor? Chickens volunteering for target practice? Steers enamored of their own enslavement? Ho-hum. What commonplace perversion. We have opened files on hundreds of those animals.
No, Burger King gives us a real pro, a true believer, a hard-core devotee of the suicidefoodist movement. On to the commercial:
A nebbishy nobody enjoys a burger in his car at the local Makeout Point. He is alone. This is merely the first horrific detail. (Does he love his sandwich? You know, love love it? Sexually?) Before we can ponder that for too long, a cow appears in the headlights. The man is nervous. The cow is an avenging spirit, sent to cast the cow-eater into fiery torment for his vicious crimes against—
No. She's there because she's… jealous. The man has betrayed her trust by
To make sure you get the right message, the announcer intones: "Chicken so good, you'll cheat on beef."
This is the vilest conflation of sex and violence we have ever seen. There's nothing for us to do now but vomit.
(Thanks to Drs. Jared and Mary for the referral.)