This mother-loving, iron-pumping pig is working hard. The sweat springs from his brow like popping popcorn as he labors to prove his worth. He isn't your average, flabby hog from St. Charles (Missouri). He has poured countless, tedious hours into creating the tough, chewy Adonis you see before you.
Where Stumpy differs from some of the other "food" animals we've seen who suffer from Self-Destructive Narcissism is in his particular brand of self-love. Oh, he still wants to die, of course. But his all-out regimen of jerks, presses, and reps isn't fueled by anger. No. He's happy. Happy to have perfected the vessel that holds the meat some lucky diner will soon be eating.
Death. Now that's perfection.
(Thanks to Dr. TIF for the referral.)