Sunday, August 9, 2009

Gold Wings & Ribs Festival

Can you imagine the dedication? The expense? The unremitting pain? How hard it is sometimes to live the dream!

Let us catalog the many elective procedures the pig underwent to effect his transformation from gentle snuffler to half-pig/half-machine helldemon:

• Ribs replaced with exhaust pipes.

• Ears modified into handlebar configuration.

• Saddle attached.

• Feet fused with standard motorcycle tires.

• Fire implanted into scalp.

• Tusks augmented.

• Tail insulated and re-coiled.

(And that doesn't even include the tattoo and steroids.)

All this, for the pleasure of being eaten! And not only that, but the pleasure of bringing the eatin' to you! Now, we've seen "food" animals so eager to die that they will bring the means of their destruction right to your door. But never have we encountered a pig who does it with such malicious verve! You will eat him if it kills you!

Addendum (4/25/10): Is this the kindler, gentler version of the surgically enhanced Fury Swine?

1 comment:

ohioisforsomething said...

The artists were obviously partakng of some "Meigs County Gold" when they came up with this.