Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Maurice's Gourmet Barbeque

Oh, that damn cap! That stupid sweater ! The haughty, taunting smirk! It could only be Maurice's Gourmet Barbeque's Little Joe.

Even the bleeding-heartiest pity junkies look on Little Joe with gritted teeth, imagining all the grisly ways he might meet his end. The crazy cat ladies who scrimp to keep Puss-Puss in tuna, the critter petters, the lovers of all things furred, finned, or feathered, the cooers and cluckers and fawners—all despise him!

Little Joe unites mankind under a seething rainbow of hatred!

He erodes goodwill like so much rust devouring… an old, um… swingset. (He has disturbed us so much, our usual eloquence has evaporated!)

We thought this turkey was smug. But next to Little Joe, he appears sincere as a Methodist.

The sidelong glance, the look that says, "Go ahead. Eat me. I want you to," the hand idly scratching a thigh…

It's enough to make us…

We just…

Damn you, Little Joe!

1 comment:

Gina said...

My first impression was that he was unenthusiastic about the whole advertising thing and hates his outfit, but managed a half-hearted grimacing smile on the prodding of whoever is paying him.

But I can see it your way too.