Smithfield Ham & Yam Festival

Speaking of animals scraping by in these tough times (which we were only last year), this pig is willing even to share the bill with a tuber. Once the undisputed king of suicide food, the pig has been forced by economic circumstances to share the stage. His stage!

Oh, he keeps smiling and mugging. Look, the pig is a professional and a gig is a gig.

He puts on the bow tie, shows up to Smithfield (North Carolina) on time, and poses for the camera.

Sure, appearing with a vegetable sticks in his craw, but a pig's gotta do what a pig's gotta do. And if this is what he's got to do to make sure he gets eaten, then he's in. This isn't like the boom times, where a pig could assume he was in the spotlight and the crowds would pour in just for a chance to taste him. A pig at the top of his form had his pick of festivals to headline.

But these days… Can't be picky now.