Thursday, December 4, 2008

Rick's Mobile Backyard Bar-B-Que

Can you read that? "Eating bad BBQ is a crime!"

The pig's crime, to be clear about this, isn't that he cannibalized a pig. Or, presumably, that he's cannibalized many pigs. (His too-small-to-make-out-here tattoo reads I {heart} BBQ.) It's that he didn't insist that the corpse be prepared and seasoned the right way.

Having committed his crime, and having found himself at the mercy of the judicial system, he shows neither contrition nor regret. No—he smiles! While wearing contraband sunglasses!

This is moral instruction? Hardly. It's the nanny state run amok!

And what of rehabilitation? When the miscreant has repaid his debt to a society obsessed with the near-constant consumption of animals, what then? Whither the pig?

Do you harbor any doubt that he will return to his pig-eating ways? And, having pledged himself to the barbecue lifestyle, do you doubt that he will, eventually, throw himself on the sour mercy of the court coals?

Addendum: The law firm of Chix, Swine, and Bovine espouses a similar legal philosophy. "Because Bad BBQ is Downright Criminal." It's nice to know the animals take such an interest in the craft of it.

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