Sunday, September 23, 2007

Coffeepot High Country Outfitters, Inc.

Are we here afforded a glimpse into the strange territory of hunterism? Has this scene ever unfolded in our actual land, the land we confidently refer to as Reality?

Yes, yes, deer have been hunted (have they ever!) and strung up. We will even concede that shapely Western-style ladies have brought down their noble prey with help from high-powered scopes.

What convinces us that we are viewing a scene from some fairyland is the attitude of the deer. Dead, dangling from a tree (?), he smiles. "All's fair in love and war," he might be saying. "Even the use of the high-powered rifle and telescopic sight. No complaints here!" He is grateful to have given his life for such an honorable cause: the, um, slaughtering of deer by... amply behatted, bebooted, bebosomed gun bunnies.

These are truly suicidefoodism's happy hunting grounds. What are we saying? Happy? These hunting grounds—these hallowed groves—are positively ecstatic! The huntresses are out in force, the rope is strong, and the bullets will never run out!


frank adam said...

I think I dated this chick. Boisterous breasts, evil grin, goofy hair, bithin' hips, and a fresh kill. Yeah I got her number.

Anonymous said...

You don't hang deer by their necks, you hang them by the tendons in their back legs. This is what I learned while spending hours in a frozen garage covered in fur and ticks, trying to keep my hands from going numb while cutting meat bits away from a frozen carcass. I've never posed by a deer for a picture, and I've never seen one smile. I've seen the bullet hole that has killed every deer I have eaten in the past 12 years, and I honestly believe that knowing where my food comes from and participating in all preparation of that meat has made me a better person.
Do I agree with pictures of smiling dead animals? No. Do I like seeing the meat in grocery stores being tossed because it has 'expired'? No. Do I think that it is wrong to eat animals? No. It's just wrong to waste them or sugarcoat what is actually going onto your plate.