Friday, July 8, 2011

Idiom Watch: Makin' Bacon

We take a break now from the crass world of commerce, with its logos, signs, slogans, come-ons, and assorted attention grabbers, and turn to the world of pure expression.

Specifically, the phrase "makin' bacon," surely one of the most unpleasant turns of phrase ever to spring from the mind of mankind.

The Contemporary Dictionary of Sexual Euphemisms by Jordan Tate (St. Martin's Press) tells us that the phrase formerly carried with it the specific sense of overweight humans having intercourse. Consider if you must the related dysphemism porking.

Nowadays, all we think of when we (infrequently!) encounter the phrase is pigs having sex to create more pigs to be consumed. "Makin' bacon," therefore, is the most perfect example of suicidefoodistic terminology we've ever come across. It also appears to be a favorite of the nation's t-shirt and tchotchke makers.

The pigs have harnessed their life force and channeled it to the needs of industry. Sex becomes an expression not of love or need or even wordless instinct, but of sterile supply and demand.

The offspring issuing from these bacon-making unions are not Khalil Gibran's "sons and daughters of life's yearning for itself." They're just commodities, born to be killed and chilled in your grocer's refrigerators.

Addendum: And we don't know what to make of this.

Addendum 2: Do you know this man?


Maximillion said...

Sweet mother of Christ. D:

Scott said...

I'd like to meet this "Porkchop Express" woman. She looks like she has a story to tell.

Anonymous said...

I have to say I'm very glad that I DON'T know that man!