Friday, April 30, 2010

Turkey Hooker

Any way you slice it, the flesh trade is a dangerous business for a turkey. You never know who you'll run into out there. Hitting the stroll in her cook-me pumps, this bird's got to keep her eyes open. She's out there trying to make a living, hoping to attract the right "customers," but sometimes your number comes up.

Like here, in the purest equating of sex with violence we have yet seen. The act of picking up—securing the services of—a turkey prostitute is held synonymous with jamming a metal hook into her carcass and picking her up from the roasting pan.

The accompanying diagram serves only to make the imagined horror explicit. The titillating becomes barbaric as the "pick up" blurs into a matter of body disposal. Through sheer, penetrative power and psychopathic derangement, the turkey's client/killer will shift the dead body into position.

(Thanks to Dr. Bea for the referral.)

5 comments:

JAB said...

Holy Shit! Forget eyeball washing, I need brain bleach!

Cynthia Haug-West said...

That is the sickest freaking piece of gadget marketing I think I've ever seen. Pardon me, my mind needs to barf.

byproduct said...

Holy holy holy shit, that is gross to the epic maximum.

Anonymous said...

noooooooooooooo!!! dear gawd, surely this is a joke, right.....right?!?!

Becci said...

They covered this on Fail blog: http://failblog.org/2010/07/15/epic-fail-photos-product-fail-6-2/

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