Thursday, February 26, 2009

Almost Relevant Breaking News: Chick-Fil-A Mascot Attacked

Quasi-suicidefoodist Cow Mascot Tackled by Mystery Assailant

Fredericksburg, VA. The Chick-Fil-A fast-food restaurant chain's cow mascot, a longtime supporter of the consumption of chickens, was knocked to the ground by an unknown shover. While not a true adherent of the suicidefoodist movement, the cow nevertheless worked closely with the purveyors of "food" animals. Police have no suspect or motive.

Note: This actually happened.

Watch the video report.


Joey said...

This is almost-relevant to your almost-relevant story:

frank adam said...

I love ths site. I might eat some meat, but this hilarious site makes me hate myself for it. I love the noose rating system. You vegans kick my ass with awesome.

Anonymous said...

This happened in Fredericksburg, VA not in Maryland.

Ben said...

Corrected. We thank you.