Uncle Dougie's Barbecue Sauce

Cozying up to Death Chicken, the Devil's Pecker, breathing the sulphur of his nethercoop, the pig and cow contemplate entering the next (which is to say, the last) stage of life's journey. The chicken might appear mundane and harmless, with his striped Polo and How's-everybody-doing demeanor, but take heed: Mefowlstopheles has come for their souls.

And before long, as they gaze into his unblinking crimson eyes, they will surrender. They all do in the end. They will give themselves over to him and follow him down, down, down.

Past the galleries of the shrieking dead, all the way to the River of Sauce. The river in which they can hope to forget.