Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Metropolitan Meat, Seafood & Poultry

The Three Musketeers. The power trio. Cow Meat, Lobster Seafood, and Chicken Poultry. True pals. Cow, the "shy one." Lobster, the "leader." Chicken, the "clown."

It's not the usual Cow-Pig-Chicken arrangement, no, but somehow, these crazy kids make it work. Lobster seems to understand that he's the nontraditional one in the bunch, and it only makes him try harder. Those legs draped around his buddies' shoulders, gigantic claws resting on them casually. Hey, whatever it takes, he'll keep them all together long enough to persuade the greater D.C. metropolitan area to eat them and their relations. (And maybe try an order of "No msg Bacon Old World" while they're at it.) Surely, just thinking about them—their bond of friendship—makes an adoring public want to eat dead animals.

A mission like this is important. It gives life—life, death, whatever—a focus. A sense of direction. Meaning. And as they travel from the District to the suburbs and back, day after day, one special song plays, a soundtrack for their hours in the refrigerated truck:

Keep smiling, keep shining
Knowing you can always count on me, for sure.
That's what friends are for.
In good times, in bad times
I'll be on your side forevermore—
Oh, that's what friends are for!

Of course, as we know by now, the bad times will be so very bad indeed.

(Thanks to Drs. Valent, KCinDC, and Karl for the referral.)


Jason said...

I love your Beatles-esque characterizations of the animals in the picture. Particularly the cow as the Harrison-like "shy one". All they're missing is a big brown-eyed deer as the "sensitive one".

Anonymous said...

AWESOME! I have seen this a bunch of times and wanted to submit it, but could not remember the company name. This cracks me up every time I see one of their trucks. (Why are all three of them looking off to their right?) The bizarre size scale of the animals always makes me laugh and yet feel slightly scared at the same time....

(I had trouble posting this; sorry if it comes up multiple times!)

Anonymous said...

ms: i think part of the reason they designed the animals to look off to the right is so that you won't have that sickening "their eyes are following me around the room" effect. imagine how much more grotesque this sign would be. and you said it was super-sized, right?..that's gonna give me nightmares.

Sooka said...

hahah! I see the truck(s) from this company driving around DC all the time! Excellent!

Anonymous said...

I was just about to submit this one. Whenever I see their trucks with that big goofy logo I think about how the truck is filled with the dead bodies of the happy characters in the picture. It's like putting a picture of a smiling dude on the side of a hearse!

Plus, I don't think that lobster is drawn to scale....