Lake Pleasant BBQ Cook-Off

Now now, boys! The cook-off is high-stakes, to be sure, but this? A physical confrontation? (These pigs seethe with enmity. The one pig is even baring his mysterious jigsaw puzzle tattoo. He means business!) Armed as you are with barbecue fork and stiff patty flipper, you could do some real damage! What would your corporate sponsor say? You, yellow shirted-pig! And you, black-shirted pig! There must be another way to settle your dispute without giving each other a vicious forking or spatulation.

And yet... Have we misread the situation? Perhaps the two rivals have come together, snout-to-snout, in the spirit of friendly—yet intense and manly—competition. Of course. That must be it. It's a cook-off, and they're going to cook-off their asses off. Which, in the intense and manly world of competitive barbecuing, can only mean grilling members of your own family (as well as the odd bird) and then hopping on the coals yourself.

"You call that sizzling? Listen to my meat cook!"

"You're drying out, loser! This is how you lock the juices in!"

May the tastiest pig win!